Bits and pieces

The other day Mamina was confused about who was Aldo. Eventually she remembered he was her husband. Today she thought the night nurse, whose name is Skyler, was my son. When I explained they just had the same name she said, "I thought he had changed a great deal".

One day she told me she'd fallen twice. I was surprised and checked with the nurse. It was her roommate that had fallen.

Her roommate Julia has a frequent visitor that looks like mother's sister in law, Argelia. Mother assumes it is Argelia and her brother visiting their grandmother, every time Julia's son and his wife come.

Mamina told me someone had taken her walker and Nina had gotten very angry, fighting and swearing at everyone. Not the Nina I know.

Sunday when I called she told me she couldn't talk because she was eating dinner at Nina's. "See you tomorrow" she told me, and hung up. Turns out she had refused to go to Nina's that day.

On a positive note, she attended an art class and painted a little bird house. She said she knew I would be pleased.

Funny moment

Mother complains about Julia being bossy, but what I see as I visit is mother trying to run Julia's life. The other day Mamina kept telling Julia to "take a rest, sleep you've been sewing all day". Julia did not take kindly to this, she angrily asked how she was bothering mother then she caught my eye to indicate with a twirling finger to the temple that mother was crazy. I had to concentrate not to laugh out loud.

Last Sunday Mother refused to go to Nina's for dinner. I tried also, unsuccessfully. She didn't feel well. As the week progressed she felt better, but began to have vivid hallucinations again.

She told me she had not been able to sleep because the whole clinic was waiting for a plane from China. The pilot's mother is at the center. They'd had a big meeting and everyone was waiting. Had I heard anything about it, she wanted to know. Another day she "had been taken to jail because the government (I think she was back in Communist Cuba) wanted to know why she had such a nice house and business" (meaning the care center). They'd "let her go because she was old".

Thursday and Friday she was extremely lucid, most of the time. Even remembered the airplane story as a dream. After a while though, she told me that the Asian lady who walks around the center is being punished. "She did something against the government back in China and now her punishment is to walk and walk non stop". The boss who makes this little lady do this is a woman at the center. Then she said, "maybe I'm that woman". Then she said that maybe she makes up these stories to entertain herself. I was amazed she realized this.

Then came Sat. I was in SL with A, S and family. Isis called from Florida. The care center had called Isis, mother had gone missing and the police had brought her back, minutes after they noticed she was gone. I got there as soon as I could. Mother did not remember leaving. She thinks someone was with her (I'm thinking guardian angel?) and "they" decided to approach a business establishment where the people helped them and called the police. One of the policemen spoke Spanish. She says they brought her to our house first, but we weren't here, so they took her to the Nursing facility. I am not sure if the part about coming to our house is real. The nursing staff says she was very distraught when she got back, couldn't even walk (as often happens when she is suffering an anxiety attack), but by the time I got there she was fine.

Mamina says she feels bad that she broke the promise she made us to not to leave the center alone again. She says that even as she was walking she was thinking about it, but she can't remember why she left. I guess any promise she makes when in her right mind goes out the window along with her mind.

I think Mamina's anxiety might be partly brought on by the confusion she's experiencing. She can tell her mind is not functioning properly and it scares her, makes her feel lost and out of control.

Yesterday she told me she had not been able to sleep because there was a little white dog that came in, then there were little girls running around all through the night. When she realized it was all a dream she felt even more confused. She said she couldn't think, wanted me to read her mind and figure it out for her. It is so sad.

Later she said she was thirsty but didn't want to drink because then she would have to go to the bathroom and it's too difficult. I asked why it was difficult and she said it was hard to get to the bathroom because "the kids were sleeping all over the floor". I pointed out that was not the case and she said it was like that during the night. More dreams and hallucinations.

She wanted to sit by me but thought Nina would not like that (?)

She seems to feel poorly in the morning, then midday she feels pretty well, after 4 PM she becomes very confused.

When I got there to see Mamina today, mid afternoon, she was outside her room, having one of those moments when she can barely move. She'd had her medication, so it had to do with anxiety. She said she'd been thinking of "escaping" but had changed her mind and now couldn't figure out how to get back in her room.

She had dinner with us on Sunday and wanted to go right back to the care center. I kept trying to delay her going back, trying to engage her in conversation, but not even an offer of dessert persuaded her. By the time we took her back she was very anxious and didn't recognize her room. (She also didn't recognize my house). It took quite a while to calm her. I need to remember this and take her back as soon as she asks.

Meanwhile, she has told me the last couple of days that she and her roommate Julia (for some reason she calls her Luisa) are now friends. Julia had wanted to get in bed with mother, to stay warm, but Mamina didn't like that.

Better again

We've had some difficult days. First Mother went on a "walkabout". At 1 AM one morning the staff at the Care Center discovered she was missing. Mother cannot remember why or how she went outside in the middle of the night. She remembers trying to get back in and not being able to. She was frightened and didn't know whether to hide in darkness or stay in lighted areas as she walked around, cold, legs hurting. They found her a block away, heading towards a busy street. I shiver to think what could have happened if she had gone out in the middle of the night while still at home. We won't have known she was gone till morning.

Last week Mother broke out in hives. She was miserable. We wondered if perhaps she was reacting to the detergents they used at the Care Center, so we took all her clothes home and rewashed them. The hives continued to spread, beyond where her clothing touched her body. We finally realized the hives had started after a couple of days of a new medication to help with anxiety, we had that stopped and it has cleared up.

There was also a problem with her medication which has to be administered at very specific times. We met with the administration and they responded immediately, moving Mother to a wing where she is receiving more attention. She was separated from her roommate Julia for a couple of days. Mother was too sick to notice, but Julia cried.

They are now together again and we can tell Mother is herself again by the funny happenings. When I got there yesterday afternoon she was trying to figure out how to hide behind the dividing curtain, I thought out of modesty because she was just wearing a night gown and Julia's son was visiting. Nope, that wasn't it, she didn't want Julia to see her and come to her side to talk! I got her some fresh cold water so Julia asked her son to get her some also. He left and Julia peeked around the curtain to talk to me. When I turned back to Mother her face was distorted, eyes big, something in her cheek that she seemed to be having trouble swallowing. I was concerned because the Parkinsons can make it hard to swallow if she hasn't had her medication. I asked what was in her mouth, she won't respond, then she was back to normal. At this point I was very concerned, trying to figure out what had been wrong. She told me that if her face is normal, Julia talks to her but if her face is distorted she leaves her alone! Nina had further funny experiences I hope she'll post.